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Where’d you go Kitten Witch?
Hi Friends! I am so sorry for the accidental hiatus and for worrying so many of you! Earlier in the year I kind of fell into an opportunity to do some more study, and between that and working and the usual spoon deficit, Kitten Witch ended up falling to the wayside. I kept aiming to update next time, then the next week, then the week after, and it just got away from me, then all of a sudden I was avoiding tumblr and social media entirely because I hadn’t caught up and I felt so bad. But my aim now is to find a reasonable schedule that I CAN maintain, knowing all of my other commitments and needs, so hopefully we’ll be back to updating in the next few weeks!

Schedule Changes
My study is either going to take me through to the end of 2018, or wrap up this June/July, but I won’t know until closer to the date. So, for the time being, Kitten Witch won’t have a set schedule, but I will try to update once a week. I’m still going to be around answering messages and asks whenever I get the chance, though!

A Note
It’s not going to be easy, but it’s going to be worth it. There are going to be set backs, but you’re going to get there. I see how much effort you’re putting into surviving, and it is phenomenal. YOU are phenomenal. You are battling a world that didn’t account for you, and you are winning just by existing. I am so grateful you’re here with me now, friend, so thank you for choosing to keep going. When it gets lonely, please remember there’s always going to be a kitten in your corner 💖

Softness & Warmth,

22 December 2017

Congratulations! America has been saved! Donald Trump is no longer the president, and the Republican Party has retreated to its secret volcano lair. Now it’s time to kick back, crack open a cold one, and enjoy America’s pastime.

For the final day of Cards Against Humanity Saves America, we really “hit it out of the park” by purchasing the naming rights to a minor league baseball stadium in Joliet, Illinois. 

Say hello to the Cards Against Humanity Baseball Place.

566 notes

18 December 2017

We’re running public opinion polls for the next year, and we found something you might be interested to know: Most Republicans would rather be dumb and happy than smart and sad. Yeah, that checks out.

More of our findings at ThePulseoftheNation.com

383 notes

18 December 2017

For Day Five of Cards Against Humanity Saves America, we’re using your money to fund a public opinion poll called The Pulse of the Nation. For an entire year, we’ll ask the American people about their social and political views, what they think of the President, if peeing in the shower is acceptable, and much more.

The results so far are… pretty incredible. Enjoy. ThePulseoftheNation.com

300 notes

13 December 2017

Mounting sociological evidence confirms something we’ve always suspected: homework sucks gorilla balls. It stifles creativity and makes kids hate learning.

For Day Four of Cards Against Humanity Saves America, we sent out cards, thank you notes from children, a policy paper written by the Chicago Children’s Museum, and we’ve partnered with Donor’s Choose to support teachers who are creating alternatives to traditional homework.

Teachers came up with a ton of ideas, like taking field trips to museums, making slime, reading with their families, and playing board games. 

You can support these projects by donating at CardsAgainstHumanityDestroysHomework.com. We’re matching your donations up to $100,000.

493 notes

11 December 2017

In order for Cards Against Humanity to truly save America, we realized we would have to tackle the biggest issue in the world: wealth inequality. Today, we took some of your money and redistributed it to people who need it more. We gave 10,000 people a $15 refund and 100 people a check for $1,000.

Read their stories: CardsAgainstHumanityRedistributesYourWealth.com

1,397 notes

06 December 2017

For Day Two of Cards Against Humanity Saves America, we launched The Good News Podcast–a daily reminder that not all news is bad.

Listen and subscribe at GoodNewsPodcast.fm.

169 notes

01 December 2017

For Day One of Cards Against Humanity Saves America, we bought a plot of vacant land on the US/Mexico border and retained a law firm specializing in eminent domain to make it as time-consuming and expensive as possible for Trump to build his dumbass wall. 


Photos by Chris Markos

2,655 notes

25 November 2017




370 notes

14 November 2017

tarpo asked: “If you aren't going to do the 12 days holiday crap again will be there some way between now and the end of the year for us to throw money at you for some reason that lets you spend it in some weird way or at least causes us to get some small piece of CAH merchandise?”

1,371 notes

13 November 2017

amberaurora asked: “Are y'all going to do a 12 days holiday crap again?”


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